If you’ve ever helped a friend carry a piece of furniture, you know that it’s not just the carrying of heavy things, it’s the holding of it in the same way, for so long. A change of grip can give you a few more yards.
So at the moment you may be tired, even though you can’t describe the shape of the thing you’ve been carrying. You know that you wish you could change your grip. If you could set it down for a minute, so you could shift it in your hands.
But how do you get that break? What would take the weight from you?
Maybe you’ve tried things already: a book, a routine, a new conversation. They helped for a while, then the weight slipped and you felt it again. So when you reach to read this, it’s not with confidence. It’s simply bare hope. Or maybe not even hope—just the instinct to try one more thing before you let yourself quit.
True, it could be another false start, and in fact you might be able to hear a voice whispering that in your head. We all know how convincing that whisper can be. There’s the fear that this might be wasted effort. Anxiety and depression both can lead to that fear. And then your memory works against you, only being able to pull up images of every failed attempt you’ve made before. All of this makes starting again feel so much harder inside than it might look from the outside.
But here is what I want to remind you of. You have permission to simply feed on something today, to take in words or participate in actions that give you hope. Whatever that is, it does not need to become a solution in itself, or a proof of anything. It’s only you accepting what is near you, what is within your reach, and maybe what is being given to you. You get to make as many beginnings as you need, as many as are given to you, as many as you are able to make.
So that’s what today can be, a time for a beginning. There will still be that piece of furniture to carry but not with that same cramped hand that needs a rest. You can pause and put it down, if only for a minute.
That “only for a minute” phrase can work for you or against you, in your mind. It can make you feel like it’s nothing, a waste, time lost, or it can feel like it’s doable, even reasonable.
I want to tell you today that it’s reasonable and doable, maybe because it is so close to being nothing. And yet is something.